15: More Cultural Collisions

So, I realize it's only been a day since I last blogged, but I feel I have more to add, thus I'm back.

Music will one of two topics in today's update. The other will be the assumptions that go with Korean people dealing with me (and likely other North Americans), and vice versa.

First, the music. I was out grocery shopping today, and it was your typical music playing in the background. You know the stuff; forgettable, bland, generic, lite-pop junk, but with Korean words. Then comes this song. It's not unusual at all to start. Just another boring song. Then the chorus hits. It takes me a second to realize that it's a Korean version of Cyndi Lauper's "She Bop." It's absolutely note perfect. Then back to the unmemorable verses, followed by the chorus again. It's so unusual. Later, I went out to a pub on my own (I'll get more into that in a bit). The music was basically the same as that heard at the grocery store, minus the Cyndi Lauper rip. Instead, I hear this song that's a seamless blend of Toni Braxton's "Unbreak My Heart," R. Kelly's "I Believe I Can Fly," and "Some Totally Forgettable Crap" by Boyz II Men, all sung in Korean with the occasional English line dealing with "the condition of my heart." All it told me was how easy it is to write such songs and make a lot of money. But I think I knew that before. Why I haven't cashed in yet is undetermined.

Now to topic two, which happened at the same time as part two of topic one. I went out to a pub by myself for the first time since arriving in Korea (I know, it's been a month, but it's a bit intimidating). I made the horrible mistake of leaving both my notebook and Lonely Planet guide at home. This would haunt me for my entire visit. I sit down, and am immediately asked, "How many here?" My answer is, "One," with appropriate index finger raised to ensure all is clear. Immediately after my answer I am asked if I speak Korean. My answer is, "Aniyo," or simply, "No." When the time comes to order, I get myself a big-ass glass of beer and randomly point at a menu item in my price range under "side orders." My big-ass beer arrives, and it really is quite large, along with some popcorn and some square-shaped pretzel-like things coated in sugar. I drink my beer and nibble on the nibblies while trying to find something to occupy my eyes. There's a TV, but it's under a populated table and I feel self-conscious looking that way. Next time, I get a window table and/or bring my notebook. Luckily, my food arrives quickly. It turns out that I just happened to point to the only thing on the menu that was printed in English, the pork cutlet. Strangely, I remember seeing it, but on a different page from that which I ordered from, thus I know that's not what I actually ordered. It was under "entrees" and I specifically ordered from the "side orders" portion of the menu. If I had managed to say something during my ordering, rather than just point, I would put it all down to a translation problem. But I pointed at an item. I'm fairly certain it wasn't a pork cutlet with sides of arrowhead-shaped chicken nuggets, mexi-fries, crinkle-cut fries, and a horrible looking coleslaw topped with what I can only guess was some sort of thousand island dressing and ketchup. I can only assume that they assumed that I would not want whatever it was I pointed at, being a foreigner and all, and gave me their most "western" meal. I only have myself to blame, really, for not bringing my trusty Lonely Planet guide with my for assistance. I'll remember it for next time, which is likely later this week. The beer was ordered successfully, though. Ah, the universal language of beer. Where would I be without it?

So, in conclusion, I have to say, you were right, Steph. Going out tonight did give me a decent story.

Steave

PS More great spell check fun, Cyndi Lauper was recommended to be cyanide lover. How nice.